Loss

We Can’t Fix Everything

“Lots of things can be fixed. Things can be fixed. But many times, relationships between people cannot be fixed, because they should not be fixed. You’re aboard a ship setting sail, and the other person has joined the inland circus, or is boarding a different ship, and you just can’t be with each other anymore. Because you shouldn’t be.”
C. JoyBell C.Happy Matters, LLC's photo.

Sometimes we have to break ties with the people we thought we would have around us forever. This separation is necessary and comes when you and that other person are fully prepared. With separation comes feelings of love and loss, anger and resentment. These feelings are normal and should be welcomed. There is learning behind every severed relationship.

Happiness Challenge Day 4

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September 11th, Day 4 of the Happiness Challenge

1. Music makes me happy. It always amazes me how a particular song can impact me in such a powerful way. No matter where I am, certain songs have a way of transporting me back in time. Whether they help me to remember a loved one or empower me to keep fighting the good fight, music has a very special place in my heart. I still remember all the songs I used to listen to during those long drives with my mom on our mommy, daughter days. The song that was playing when I first got my heart-broken and the songs that remind me of those people who are longer by my side. Music comforts me in times of struggle and bring me closer to my power when I feel as though my situation appears hopeless. No matter the style of music, I can always I can always count on its ability to move me. I admire the individuals who create such works of art and I appreciate them for bringing such beauty to this world.

“Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination
and life to everything.” Plato

2. Embracing my emotions makes me happy. As a cancer I am by nature an emotional person. Rarely can I ever hold back  or hide the way I feel. Often sympathetic to other feelings, I struggle at times with the idea that I must take on others emotions as my own. While I recognize this within myself it is not an easy task to master. Everyday I welcome the emotions that stir from within me. I embrace and acknowledge them in the moment and do my very best to share my feelings whenever appropriate. Ignoring or pushing these feelings down has never served me. Historically it has only led me to brood over the things that make me unhappy. This only serves as a barrier to forward movement. Today I consistently practice embracing my truth. Whether pleasant or unpleasant our emotions are meant to be heard. They guide us to authenticity and to greater learning.

“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart” Helen Keller

3. Practicing self-love make me happy. As a life coach I encounter quite a number of people whom struggle to love themselves. “I am not enough” is often a common theme I hear coming from individuals. Practicing self-love takes a lot of effort in a society that is constantly comparing you to others. Stepping out as a unique individual takes courage. I find that tag lines and mantra’s often aid me in my practice towards self-love. It is easy to fall into the habit of being overly critical of oneself, but it takes practice and patience to acknowledge the good we all have within us. Everyday I choose an area or quality in myself that needs attention and love. I focus my energy on building that area up and giving it the love and support it needs to overcome any of my negative thought patterns. I will repeat these positive words to myself from the start of my day. It sets the tone for the way I show up to the world and in addition, how I show up for myself. Learning to love oneself is not selfish in any way. It is healthy and absolutely necessary. We should be our greatest supporters and we should love who we are no matter what. 

“Dare to love yourself as if you were a rainbow with gold at both ends.” Aberjhani 

 “I am powerful in my love for myself. The truth of my being is I love myself exactly as I am. I honor my empowered heart.” Amy Leigh Mercree

 

Ambition in the City

 

Ponder This…

What will you STOP rejecting and what will you START embracing? 

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Illustration Credit: suzannerivard.com

 

 

 

 

Do Stuff!!

Get out there and do stuff that matters! Go big, be bold and above all stop waiting for opportunities to present themselves. Create the life you want today! – Happy Matters LLC

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For more information on living fully email me at creyeros@gmail.com

Now offering a complimentary coaching session to those that are CURIOUS about taking the next steps towards the life they have always envisioned. Sessions are offered in person or via Skype. Let’s get connected today! 

Ponder This…

What risks are you willing to take to get you where you want to be? 

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When you take risks you gift yourself with the opportunity to learn. Regardless if your attempt is a success or a failure, learning brings with it its own rewards. Take pride in the risks you have taken. In the grand scheme of things the lessons are just as important as the desired outcome.

Ambition In The City

Keep Moving Forward

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Image Credit: Dougal Waters via Getty Images

 

It’s not always easy to leave things in the past but we can never truly heal until we open our eyes to all that is still ahead of us. What are you looking forward to? 

Ambition In The City

Dwell on the Beauty of Life

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Ever notice that people often tend to reexamine their lives during moments of significant transition? Whether it’s after experiencing the loss of a loved one, losing a job, or being diagnosed with a serious illness we tend to hold off on looking at our lives until we face moments of  helplessness. Why is this so often the trend?

fake-buddha-the-trouble-is-you-think-you-have-timeThe trouble is we think we have time.  While I am in no way implying that we should spend our days dwelling on the negative things that could befall us, I would like to encourage us to put more attention on life and living in general. Time is an illusion created in our consciousness.  This mental construct has aided us to divert from our truth. Time keeps us from taking on what we can in the moment in exchange for holding out for something else or something more. Time keeps us from saying yes to ourselves. It fools us into thinking we can hold off on taking that dream vacation or changing our career path. It allows us to sit in our stubbornness and hold onto grudges with our fellow-man. Time keeps us from taking those risks that could ultimately lead us to our higher purpose. Time is a wolf in sheep’s clothing.  The concept of time merely robs us from living in the present. When we believe in the concept of time we to learn to ignore our feelings, emotions and desires and instead push them aside for what we hope will unfold in the future.

It saddens me to know that I too have lived in this way. Always focused on the future and what I needed to do next, I have come to realize how many missed opportunities I have had to be fully present. As I went about my daily routine I was always thinking about the next month or the next year. I was failing at living in the present by dwelling on the idea of a better future.  I have pushed off tough conversations for the sake of believing it could be done at a later time.  I have put people and things on the back burner because I took for granted that I would have the time to deal with them down the road. “I’ll get another chance.” “It just wasn’t meant to be.” These were statements I found myself saying often and over time I found that they succeeded in making me believe my actions were justified.

Over the course of our lives we have each experienced significant moments where life presented us with opportunities to change our way of being. Whether it was a traumatic experience, a loss or an unexpected financial hardship; in these moments time had a way of standing still. It was at these points in our lives that we were forced to stop, to take notice, and to feel. There was no putting it off till later. There was only the here and now.  We needed to act and we needed to act fast. It was during these experiencing that we realized how fragile life is. We realized how limited our time is on this earth, and how a change needed to be made within ourselves if we are ever going to live a full life. These moments served as our wakeup call. “Life is happening right now!” “I’ve missed out on so much.” It’s my turn to live now!” These statements would begin to ring in your mind as you suddenly became aware of all the living you’ve missed out on. Life had been going on without you and it was time to rejoin the living.

While these types of situations can be expected in one’s life time they shouldn’t be relied upon to shake us up. Why wait for a life altering experience to occur when you can chose to alter your life on your own? In order to be fully present one must let go of the concept of time and give into the present. We should not wait to take inventory of our lives during moments of stress or loss, but instead examine our lives in the moment with every choice and action we decide to take. We must start addressing our feelings, wants and needs as they emerge from within us. Saying yes to yourself begins with first listening to what it is your body, mind and spirit are yearning for. Stop ignoring, putting off, or second guessing those internal messages that are being sent to you every second of every day. These moments are your truth just waiting to be acknowledged. Stop dwelling on what may be and step fully into what is right in this moment. Dwell on the beauty of life as you live it. Take in the good, the bad, the triumphs and the hardships and see them for what they are as they occur. Allow for the feelings and emotions that emerge within you to have a voice each and every day. Give yourself permission to listen, question, realize, and ultimately unlock what is true and beautiful about your life and everything around you.

As I was writing this post this morning I received an email from my mother which included a thought-provoking quote ironically on this very subject. I like to think that these words were meant for me and meant for each and every one of you. They are a reminder of how caught up we can all get in attaining what a lot of us believe is the “perfect life”. Perfect is what is happening in this very moment. Embrace the present and dwell on the beauty of life.

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Ambition In The City